Sunday, March 11, 2012

I hate yams

I have changed 3 poo diapers in the last two hours. Please stop.

It's yam poo. I fed the child one ounce of yams yesterday, and she is now expelling it with the angry ass power of a thousand suns. It seriously smells like a human body died and rotted in her diaper. I am covered in hand sanitizer and am wondering how much a hazmat suit would cost, and could I get one off of amazon?

2 minutes later...

Yes, amazon does sell hazmat suits. How could I doubt this? But perhaps even better is this gas mask which is $20, and 80% off retail price. According to the product description, this is "the gas mask issued to Israeli civilians when threatened with chemical attack by Saddam's Iraq. It has full NBC (neuclear, biological, chemical) protection, and comes with one sealed filter. Mask is new, unissued cond. and has hydration port (comes with drinking straw but not canteen cap)". Perfect.


1 comment:

  1. $20 seems totally worth it. sure, you'll scar your daughter forever/provide nightmare fodder, but really, it's all about you, right?

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