I used to think that the very fact that I have to wipe pee and poo off of someone else's butt is pretty bad. But I've recently learned that I actually had it pretty good for a while.
Because now, Violet cries everytime I lay her down to change her diaper. I have to change her diaper about 6 or 7 times a day, so this is bad. I don't know why she cries now, and why the prior 2000 diaper changes didn't upset her at all. Maybe the 2001th diaper change was the last straw? And she wriggles, turning from side to side, stiffening her legs and arching her back, all the while crying "please! please let me roll around in my poop! PLEASE! NO GIVE ME BACK MY POOOOOP DON'T TAKE IT AWAAAAAY!"
She also reaches down to touch what I'm touching. Like, her pee and poop. And then she wants to touch the wall, her clothes, HER FACE, HER EYES, HER MOUTH immediately afterward. It's very hard to simultaneously lift her legs, wipe her butt, pull her hands away from her crotch, out of her mouth, etc. I need 8 arms, but I only have 2. So she's probably ingesting bits of pee and poop regularly now.
And don't get me started with the poop getting on her clothes. Violet's day is not complete if she hasn't gotten some poop on her clothes. This world doesn't have enough Purell.
I am thinking of adding restraints to her changing pad. Little baby restraints on her wrists and ankles. Furry ones, in pink. With little bear faces on them. You know, to make them cute and stuff. We can call them "baby huggers" or something. Good idea, yes?
Oh, poor V. But surely you had the same curiosity. And you turned out fine(ish).
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